by Bobbi Palmer
It’s discouraging when you go out with a great guy and feel some kind of “connection”, but then you NEVER hear from him again.
Or he texts and asks if you’re available this weekend, but never follows up to actually make plans.
He just sort of…disappears.
As a dating coach, I hear these types of stories from women everyday. They think the men are flakey or worry that they’ve said or done something wrong on a date.
Was the guy not into them because of their independent spirit, something to do with their age, or appearance?
I want to reassure you right now, 9 times out of ten, the reason he’s not calling you has ZERO to do with any of these things.
Most likely it’s about him simply not feeling the same level of ATTRACTION and excitement YOU may have felt.
Which sucks if you thought he was amazing and cute and you want to see him again, I know.
Fortunately, though, there’s a proven way to remedy that next time you go out on a date.
How? By making some simple, yet powerful changes to what you typically say and do on a date. It will be the difference between him seeing you as the typical forgettable date and someone he simply can’t stop thinking about and NEEDS to see again.
5 Ways to Make Him Feel That Rush of Excitement When He Thinks About You After a Date
Dazzling him on the date takes a positive approach, finesse, skill, and the courage to be your real self.
What you want is to make a great impression without SEEMING like you’re working too hard at it.
There are many ways I advise my clients to do this while they’re out on a date, and in this article I’m going to share five of them with you. Here they are, in no particular order:
1LISTEN the way a man wants you to.
Simply put, let him speak! Keep easy eye contact and let him talk with no interruptions; not even uh-huhs, oh yeahs or me-toos. Smiles and chuckles are okay.
Sometimes we can get really into what a guy is saying and we may want to let him know that we’ve been there, too. We can relate, we want to say! And oh yeah, proceed to tell him about a time when a similar thing happened to us!
Don’t.
When you let a man speak without interruptions, he’ll feel so good around you. And when he’s finished, you can then tell him your story and hopefully, he’ll listen to you without interruptions, too. Won’t that make you feel so heard and understood? That’s the way he’ll feel, too.
2Mirror him.
Get on his wavelength by mirroring his body language, tone of voice, energy, etc. He’ll feel an instant attraction to you and he won’t even know why.
If he’s sitting back with his legs crossed, relax back into your chair and cross your legs or ankles. If he’s laughing and energized, laugh along with him and raise your eyebrows in a sort of “wow, tell me more” kind of way. If he’s using a lot of hand gestures to get his point across, see if you can also insert some hand gestures when you’re speaking.
This is powerful stuff. Just make sure you’re being subtle about it. This isn’t Simon Says!
3Avoid negative stories and conversations.
Keep the conversation positive and don’t bond over the bad stuff. Nix the talk about crappy exes, jobs you hate, or pain-in-the-butt children or grandchildren.
Make a plan for how you’ll respond positively when he asks you about your divorce or your crappy job. You don’t want to leave him with the impression that you’re a downer. Keep it real but keep it positive!
4Agree even when you disagree.
This too is about staying positive. When he tells you that he loves to play golf, don’t just say, “I don’t golf.” Tell him, “Oh yes, my brother’s a great golfer…he loves it too!” (And btw: just because he loves something or believes something you don’t, never assume that’s a deal breaker. Who says life partners have to think the same and do everything together?)
You want him to go home after the date and think, “Wow, I really felt a connection with her!” He won’t do that if you were being a contrarian the entire time.
5Always leave him wanting more.
This is just a date, not a lifetime. We women tend to want to dig deep and get it all out all at once.
He doesn’t need your entire life story on the first or second date. Slow down and get comfortable with taking time to get to know him.
Allow him to hold some things back, and give him just a little bit of your story. Not only will this create some intrigue and make him want to see you again, but it will keep you from being a chatterbox. (We do that…admit it.)
These are relatively simple tips, but you’d be surprised at how many women don’t think about them, let alone practice them when out with a guy.
Instead, most just “wing it” and end up doing and saying the same things the same way, date after date…and getting the same results. Which is—not a lot of follow-up dates. Or getting ghosted.
There’s a much better way of approaching dating, and I’ve been teaching this approach to thousands of women for the last 15 years and seeing these women have great success with men.
If you want to spark a man’s interest and get him calling you and pursuing you, you’re going to want to take action right now, even BEFORE he asks you out…
The Secret to Making a Man Feel a “Connection” With You on a Date so He’ll Want to See You Again SOON
I shared just a handful of the simple, yet powerful secrets to how to spark a man’s interest and get him to want to see you again after a date. I know these strategies work, because I’ve heard countless clients tell me that it’s made all the difference for them. They were able to effortlessly get to date #2, 3, 4…and so on, just by changing what they said or didn’t say on the first date.
You see, what I’ve learned in the last 15 years of coaching women about dating and relationships is that 90% of women keep doing, saying, and thinking the SAME things before, during and after a date, and they therefore keep getting the same discouraging results.
It’s why they’re still single after years of dating men. It’s why they aren’t asked out for more dates. It’s why they aren’t having fun or getting past that initial getting-to-know-you phase.
I’ve helped thousands of women find love by teaching them specific skills and secrets to attract the right man—including how to stay true to their values while gaining control of their dating life.
But since I can’t possibly work with every woman who needs this kind of help, I’ve partnered with Flourish so I can extend that help and guidance to as many women as possible.
When you subscribe to our FREE Relationship Advice Newsletter, you get access to more articles like these, from an accomplished community of carefully selected experts (like me!).
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- Even more strategies on how to “dazzle” him on a date or ramp up attraction so that he can’t wait to see you again.
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- How to end the heartbreak of ghosting, rejection, and go-nowhere relationships by avoiding or reversing the 10 most common dating mistakes
- A powerful process that will allow you to break the old patterns keeping you stuck and single
- The #1 reason behind all relationship failure—and how you can heal yourself AND your relationship at the same time
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Love,
