Let me ask you a very personal question.
Isn’t life so much better when you’re having great sex?
Isn’t your step lighter and your mind clearer? Don’t everyday annoyances bother you less? Aren’t you more at peace with yourself, more optimistic, more content with your lot in life?
When you’re having a wonderful time in the bedroom on a regular basis with your beloved, you no doubt feel healthier, more vital and younger.
The joy you experience with your lover causes all your relationships to be more harmonious. You’re more patient, less reactive and more fun to be around.
Do you remember how that felt? It’s wonderful, isn’t it?
When you’re getting along with your mate, you feel grateful, appreciative, and have clarity about the direction of your life.
Wait, you don’t think these statements are true?? Then you’ve probably never had great sex on a REGULAR basis.
That’s because sex, done skillfully and correctly, can be the most potent transformational tool for love and wellbeing.
If your sex life isn’t contributing to your overall sense of happiness and wellbeing—it’s likely because the sex you ARE having is less than satisfactory or it’s sub-par AND infrequent.
And if you’re not having great sex on a regular basis, you’re probably putting the blame on all the wrong things…
When you think of WHY you’re not having great sex on a regular basis, what reasons come to mind? Who or what is to blame?
Your busy schedule and your exhaustion…
Your partner, their lack of libido or sense of romance…
Your partner’s annoying or inconsiderate behavior…
Your work, your kids, your health…
Your feelings about your body…
Or maybe sex isn’t at the top of your priorities…
Yes, all of these forces (you think) have conspired to keep you from having a great sex life.
And that’s a shame, because if you squander or neglect it, sex can become a source of frustration, shame and pain.
But for those who nourish and protect their sexuality, who use it properly with a loving and supportive partner, sexuality can bring profound benefits to body and soul.
The Love-Generating Power of Great SexIn my private practice as a Chinese medicine practitioner and sex educator, I help couples from all walks of life get back on track—physically, emotionally and sexually.
One such couple was Jenny and Tom (not their real names) who had been married 13 years when they came to me for acupuncture treatment for a variety of physical ailments.
I witnessed their marital discord in our first meeting, when Jenny criticized her husband for making them late and continued to insert barbs throughout our conversation. Tom held his tongue.
I learned later that when they met, Jenny had been attracted to Tom’s easygoing nature and composure under stress. Tom admired Jenny’s outgoing personality and her ability to unabashedly ask for what she wanted.
At first it was a good match: Tom calmed Jenny when she needed it, and she invigorated and inspired him to accomplish his goals.
As the years passed, their strengths became weaknesses. Jenny grew resentful of always being the one to initiate, and Tom shrank into his shell from her constant belittling.
As for their sex life, Jenny initiated frequently and was just as often rebuffed. When they did make love, she had to work hard to reach orgasm. Tom, meanwhile, became ambivalent about making love to his wife, which made Jenny feel abandoned and edgy.
The “dirty little secret” was that Tom was masturbating daily because he found it easier to please himself than it was to please his wife in ALL aspects of their life together, including the bedroom. Therefore, he wasn’t as into doing it with Jenny as he might have been otherwise.
This secret created an impasse in their relationship. Jenny, feeling ignored by her husband, became even more controlling. Tom lost his confidence and therefore, he retreated and became increasingly passive.
Because I know the intricate connection between physical health and sexual dynamics, I took a holistic approach to their problems. I treated them with a combination of acupuncture, herbs and diet, but I also advised them in other, more personal changes that would improve their sex life.
But this prescription involved more than just the physical act. It had to do with the energy they were projecting outward, their behavior toward each other and the way they felt about themselves.
In other words, I showed them how to nourish their sexuality.
According to 5,000-year-old Chinese wisdom, everything in the world can be placed on a continuum whose central point, like a seesaw, is perfect balance. On one side of the continuum are the masculine traits, called yang, and on the other side are the feminine traits of yin.
The energies complement and balance each other, and they don’t necessarily correspond to gender.
Feminine energy, or yin traits, include being receptive and open. Masculine energy, or yang traits, include being proactive and openly expressive.
In Tom and Jenny’s relationship, their energies had gone out of balance. Tom was behaving like a wimp (deficient in YANG, the aspect of his energy that inspires healthy contribution) and Jenny was behaving like a controlling shrew (deficient in YIN, the aspect of her energy that inspires receptivity and flexibility).
This was problematic because it was deteriorating their fundamental attraction and appreciation for each other.
Progress in a relationship is made possible by the masculine YANG ability to initiate, combined with the feminine YIN ability to receive.
Jenny needed desperately to access a more balanced and healthier version of her sexuality—a softer, more feminine and receptive side. To do so, she needed Tom to express his male sexuality, or his strong and assertive side. In turn, Tom needed to have Jenny’s respect, trust and encouragement.
I counseled them in ways to strengthen their yin/yang energies through behavior, lifestyle and self-care.
I also showed them practical ways to slow down in the bedroom, so that Jenny could enjoy the sensations and not have to work so hard to experience pleasure. I explained to Tom how he could prolong his pleasure at the same time he was driving Jenny flush with lust and desire.
Because Jenny became more relaxed and responsive, Tom became more confident in his abilities to please his wife and therefore, initiated more often.
With these shifts in behavior and technique, both their satisfaction skyrocketed and they became more affectionate with each other. Their overall demeanor toward each other had shifted. Their aches and pains had abated. And the tension they felt around each other dissolved.
On a continuum of pleasure, sex can produce pain, turnoff and regret at the negative extreme; ecstatic bliss at the positive extreme.
On a continuum of emotional closeness, sex can alienate partners from each other or produce varying degrees of closeness and intimacy.
On a health continuum, sex can be depleting or it can be revitalizing and a tool for preventing or healing illness and extending lifespan.
When you learn superior techniques for lovemaking, you can move in a positive direction on each of the continuums, regardless of where you started out.
In Chapter Two of my Passion Play eBook, audio and video program, you’ll learn the signs and symptoms to look for that signal that your energies are depleted or out of balance. You’ll understand why your body might hunger for someone new or why you might have lost desire for your partner.
Next, you’ll learn specific and practical ways to enhance your yin or yang energy, so you can feel a magnetic attraction toward your partner and more ease and flow in the relationship.
You’ll also learn how to harness the power of seduction, so you can both crave lovemaking and enjoy the benefits more often. This involves learning foreplay and intercourse strategies and techniques for both partners. Seduction strategies that are attuned to yin-yang principles set the stage for more inspired and harmonious lovemaking, which leads to powerful health benefits for your bodies, minds and souls.
Finally, you’ll learn time-tested do’s and don’ts for seducing a man or a woman, some of which will surprise and delight you.
Get Passion PlayThis program will also show you:
Once you complete my Passion Play program, your love life will never be the same.
You’ll no longer be guilty of predictability when it comes to sex.
Your relationship will feel more fun and more connected.
Your life will feel easier, happier, more vibrant.
And it all starts with invigorating your sexuality and transforming your relationship with great and skillful sex.
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Start Reading or ListeningWarmly,
P.S. Stop using the same boring seduction techniques! Learn how to harness your natural male or female sexuality to drive your partner crazy with desire.